Letters you would like to write.

[Liladia]

Dear Kas,

The momma hampster ate all her babies, I lied when I told you that God made them explode because you were touching yourself.

Sorry about that.

Xav.

This is all I can think of when I read that post:

[yt=425,350]MseJEYK50rc[/yt]

[thrun]

I like this one better

[yt=425,350]jybGyuRYwug[/yt]

[Garenth]

Dear Shane,

If you're unhappy with our attire and sporting events, then why do you mimic them and know so much about them? Let it out my friend, we know you want to be one of us.

Sincerely,
Rednecks

Dear REDnecks,

Just because most of my family is redneck coming from the hills of West by god Virginia doesn't mean I have to be one as well.  Now don't get me wrong I've got nothing against you, just not sure why you do it and still believe pro wrestling is a real sport!  The 90's are dead and gone let them go in peace!

Thanks

Shane

[Segnam]

This thread is so sweet, it needs to be sticky I think.  Also.....

Dear customer,

When you buy things from the website, it says clearly on the site and on your printout that you CAN NOT return stuff to the stores.  You have to send it back to the website.  Did schools not teach people how to read back in the day or what lol?

[Ziprar]

Idiot who shouldn't even use a computer,

   When I tell you that I need to perform a wipe and reinstall on your system, then explain to you four times what that means, DO NOT call me and ask where your "Party Poker" icon is.

Thanks,
Marc

[Kastil]

Dear Kas,

The momma hampster ate all her babies, I lied when I told you that God made them explode because you were touching yourself.

Sorry about that.

Xav.

So I can touch myself now?  Thank god! You don't know how hard it is to wash or wipe your butt without touching yourself.  I've had a horrible case of diaper rash for the past 23 years.

[Bleedhoof]

Dear My Boss,

Get your head out of your ass, you hair smels like shit.

-Brian

[thrun]

Dear Gin, camel wide lights, sushi and Irish Car bombs,
You should have warned me that you would not sit well in my stomache and make be vomit all over the bushes outside my apartment complex.

-Bob

[Volk]

Dear PETA,
   If we weren't supposed to eat animals, God wouldn't have made them so tasty and given us guns.
~Bryan

[Liladia]

Dear Gin, camel wide lights, sushi and Irish Car bombs,
You should have warned me that you would not sit well in my stomache and make be vomit all over the bushes outside my apartment complex.

-Bob

You're not supposed to EAT cigarettes, silly! Of course you feel like crap

[Ellanorah]

Dear Stupid lady customer

I can't give you a $10 note if I dont have any.  Stop asking, asking is not going to make one magically appear in my register drawer. I do have two $5 notes, though. I dont know what the difference is.  It's still ten dollars.  Idiot woman.

piss off.

-Allison

[thrun]

Dear Gin, camel wide lights, sushi and Irish Car bombs,
You should have warned me that you would not sit well in my stomache and make be vomit all over the bushes outside my apartment complex.

-Bob

You're not supposed to EAT cigarettes, silly! Of course you feel like crap

I am such a noob

[Liladia]

Dear Gin, camel wide lights, sushi and Irish Car bombs,
You should have warned me that you would not sit well in my stomache and make be vomit all over the bushes outside my apartment complex.

-Bob

You're not supposed to EAT cigarettes, silly! Of course you feel like crap

I am such a noob

At least it sounds like you had a good time achieving noobishness (noobvana?). Sometimes I could just kill for a beer or a margarita. Only 9 more weeks!

[Liladia]

Dear baby girl (we're still undecided on a name):

My uterus is not a gymnasium. It's awesome that you're showing such acrobatic skill and desire for punching, kicking and dancing at such a young age, but seriously, lay off sometimes! I think that I have internal bruising.

Oh, and the alternative is NOT to squish my bladder or stomach into a miniature percentage of their former size. I'm not a newborn; I shouldn't be peeing my pants or throwing up at the slightest provocation!

Why? Because I said so!

Sincerely,

Your Mom (that's so weird to say)

[thrun]

Dear baby girl (we're still undecided on a name):

My uterus is not a gymnasium. It's awesome that you're showing such acrobatic skill and desire for punching, kicking and dancing at such a young age, but seriously, lay off sometimes! I think that I have internal bruising.

Oh, and the alternative is NOT to squish my bladder or stomach into a miniature percentage of their former size. I'm not a newborn; I shouldn't be peeing my pants or throwing up at the slightest provocation!

Why? Because I said so!

Sincerely,

Your Mom (that's so weird to say)

Mebbe you should punch back?